latest project

A few saturdays ago was the annual La Leche League picnic.  I was placed in charge of food and fliers.  In the past, an event like this with me in charge of something would be stressful.  I would feel nervous about what everyone would think about the event and whether people thought I did a good job.  And really--I didn't want people to think I did a good job.  I wanted people to think I did the best job EVER!  Well, I probably don't need to say, that with those kinds of hopes, the pressure is turned up.  A few years ago, I realized that when we had anyone over, or a party or anything I would feel stress and pressure which would lead to irritability.  I  didn't think this was the way it was supposed to be.  So, some soul-searching unveiled that this pattern of emotions involved with entertaining was actually learned.  So, how am I un-learning it?  I've begun to draw the line between entertaining and hospitality.  My sweet friend and one-time mentor, Mrs. Jeannette Olps, explained that entertaining centers around making things look hard and hospitality doesn't need that.  Hospitality was serving others and not on making a beautifully themed dinner party.  Not that I ever succeeded in that.  What would usually happen is amongst all the ideas that overwhelmed me I ended up going for manageable.  Originally, I wanted people to marvel at my work on the food and how clean and beautiful my house was, etc.  Now, I just want a good time with friends.  I've had lots of great examples to look to in hospitality over the years.  The Frey family that "adopted" me while away at college would have me over all the time after Sunday church.  They fixed a delicious but simple meal but it was so easy.  No red carpet was rolled out, and no one seemed to stress over there being enough food for us.  So relaxed and so nice.  I've been to friends' houses where kids toys were everywhere--and kids for that matter.  Food was presented casually but the conversation was rich!  So, as I have had people over, I would remind myself often that the point is not to impress but to be hospitable.  The point is enjoying time together and not "making it look hard".  I love it when people make it look easy.  A simple soup.  A chili.  Sandwiches.  It is enough to make me feel welcome.